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Survey: Marriage and Parenthood Drift Apart

June 30, 2007 By Leave a Comment

NEW YORK (AP) – The Pew Research Center’s brand new survey on marriage and parenting found that Americans believe that births to unwed women are a big problem for society, and they take a mixed view at best of cohabitation without marriage. Yet these two nontraditional behaviors have become commonplace among younger adults, who have a different set of moral values from their elders about sex, marriage and parenthood.

This generational values gap helps to explain the decades-long surge in births to unmarried women – which now comprise nearly four-in-ten (37%) births in the United States – as well as the sharp rise in living together without getting married, which, the Pew survey finds, is something that nearly half of all adults in their 30s and 40s have done for at least a portion of their lives. But this generational divide is only part of a more complex story. Americans of all ages, this survey finds, acknowledge that there has been a distinct weakening of the link between marriage and parenthood. In perhaps the single most striking finding from the survey, just 41% of Americans now say that children are “very important” to a successful marriage, down sharply from the 65% who said this in a 1990 survey.

Indeed, children have fallen to eighth out of nine on a list of items that people associate with successful marriages – well behind “sharing household chores,” “good housing,” “adequate income,” “happy sexual relationship,” and “faithfulness.” Back in 1990, when the American public was given this same list on a World Values Survey, children ranked third in importance.

Other key takeaways from the survey:

  • A Generation Gap in Behaviors and Values. Younger adults attach far less moral stigma than do their elders to out-of-wedlock births and cohabitation without marriage. They engage in these behaviors at rates unprecedented in U.S. history. Nearly four-in-ten (36.8%) births in this country are to an unmarried woman. Nearly half (47%) of adults in their 30s and 40s have spent a portion of their lives in a cohabiting relationship.
  • Public Concern over the Delinking of Marriage and Parenthood. Adults of all ages consider unwed parenting to be a big problem for society. At the same time, however, just four-in-ten (41%) say that children are very important to a successful marriage, compared with 65% of the public who felt this way as recently as 1990.
  • Marriage Remains an Ideal, Albeit a More Elusive One. Even though a decreasing percentage of the adult population is married, most unmarried adults say they want to marry. Married adults are more satisfied with their lives than are unmarried adults.
  • Children Still Vital to Adult Happiness. Children may be perceived as less central to marriage, but they are as important as ever to their parents. As a source of adult happiness and fulfillment, children occupy a pedestal matched only by spouses and situated well above that of jobs, career, friends, hobbies and other relatives.
  • Cohabitation Becomes More Prevalent. With marriage exerting less influence over how adults organize their lives and bear their children, cohabitation is filling some of the vacuum. Today about a half of all nonmarital births are to a cohabiting couple; 15 years ago, only about a third were. Cohabiters are ambivalent about marriage – just under half (44%) say they to want marry; a nearly equal portion (41%) say they aren’t sure.
  • Divorce Seen as Preferable to an Unhappy Marriage. Americans by lopsided margins endorse the mom-and-dad home as the best setting in which to raise children. But by equally lopsided margins, they believe that if married parents are very unhappy with one another, divorce is the best option, both for them and for their children.
  • Racial Patterns are Complex. Blacks are much less likely than whites to marry and much more likely to have children outside of marriage. However, an equal percentage of both whites and blacks (46% and 44%, respectively) consider it morally wrong to have a child out of wedlock. Hispanics, meantime, place greater importance than either whites or blacks do on children as a key to a successful marriage – even though they have a higher nonmarital birth rate than do whites.

    • Filed Under: Breaking News, Missional, The City, The Cultural Conversation, Urban Church

    It’s Almost Tour Time!

    June 26, 2007 By Leave a Comment

    ipho.jpgAs we get close to the Fourth of July, I begin to get excited for the Tour de France, the toughest three weeks in sport. I love to watch the race highlights each night, as the riders cover more than 3, 550 kilometers. The race runs from Saturday July 7th to Sunday July 29th 2007. This is the 94th running of the Tour de France and the race course will be made up of a prologue and 20 stages and will cover a total distance of 3,550 kilometres, as the riders encounter 11 flat stages, 6 mountain stages,1 medium mountain stage, and 2 individual time-trial stages.

    This year, the Tour is mired in doping muck, but race leader Christian Prudhomme is putting down the hammer to ensure this is a clean race this year. He commented to Reuters, “The Tour de France has been wounded by doping scandals and must now work to restore its image. Yes, the Tour has been damaged, but it is strong. What other event could resist what’s happening the way it has?”

    Last year, American Floyd Landis tested positive for testosterone on his way to victory and is unlikely to learn the outcome of his doping hearing before this year’s Tour, in which he will not take part, starts from London on July 7. The Tour also suffered another blow last month when Dane Bjarne Riis, the 1996 winner, said he had used banned drugs between 1993 and 1998.

    “The Tour must regain its credibility and its dignity,” Prudhomme told Le Monde. “Today, the will (to fight doping) is there because doping is the enemy of the Tour.” Tour organizers have urged teams not to enter any rider involved in the doping investigation in Spain known as Operacion Puerto. Prudhomme said only riders who fully accept the anti-doping rules would be allowed to compete. “We will oppose the presence at the start of the Tour of any rider who will not have signed the International Cycling Union’s anti-doping charter,” he said, adding that race organizers would take the matter to the Court of Arbitration for Sport (CAS) if needed.

    Filed Under: Tour De France

    iPhone – Is it worth it?

    June 25, 2007 By Leave a Comment

    ipho.jpgIt retails for $500….It has lead to a huge increase in Apple’s stock price since the announcement of the iPhone in January. The hype around Apple Inc.’s upcoming iPhone is abundantly clear. So is the hysteria. But is it worth it? Will the gadget – which triples as a cell phone, iPod media player and a wireless Web device – be as “revolutionary” as Apple CEO Steve Jobs has claimed? Will it revolutionize your life?

    The proof will come June 29 when the iPhone gets into users’ hands. The all-touch-screen device, which lacks a button keyboard, will force users to get accustomed to typing messages on a virtual keyboard instead of regular buttons. It will also be using a slower 2.5-generation network instead of a 3-G network, which might also hamper the experience of data transfers or Web access. Many people are already clamoring for the gadget. More than 1 million people have signed up with Apple and AT&T for more information.

    I am in the market for a replacement to my 2 year old Treo 650 — but I am not sure I want to make the swap to a rookie in the phone business. While Apple does many things well, they have not been a long term player in the phone business.  Should I wait and see?  Are you planning to switch? What do you think?

    Filed Under: Breaking News, Methods & Strategies, Tech Tips, Technology

    How’s Your Dialogue?

    June 21, 2007 By Leave a Comment

    “When it comes to improving performance, most organizations’ problems can be traced to their inability to think and talk together at critical moments.”– Paraphrased from William Isaacs’s book Dialogue, p.3

    How do you talk to your staff? How do you conduct a meeting? Do you generally have good dialogue with your staff, first talking, then listening and then responding appropriately? Doug Sundheim of Fast Company tells us that “What passes as “communication” in most organizations is nothing more than people talking AT each other. Firing different opinions around a room with little structure to productively move any action forward. The dialogue is dysfunctional – meaning that it doesn’t produce a deeper understanding of the issues at hand. Eventually, when a decision must be made, it’s often the person who has spoken the loudest, longest, or with the most conviction that wins – whether it was the best idea or not.”

    Good dialogue can be boiled down to 5 key elements – Listening, Respecting, Suspending, Voicing, and Inquiring. When dialogue breaks down, it’s usually because one or more of these are missing between the players involved.

    Try this:

    Think of an unproductive conversation you’ve recently had. Consider the following questions to see where you might have been contributing to the problem.

    1. Listening – Did I truly hear what the other person(s) said?
    2. Respecting – Did I respect their opinions – even if I didn’t agree with them?
    3. Suspending – Did I suspend my own opinions long enough to create an opening for new perspectives?
    4. Voicing – Did I say what I truly thought and felt in a responsible way?
    5. Inquiring – Did I probe for clarification when things weren’t clear?
    6. When you find that one or more of these are missing, experiment with ways to bring them into the conversation.


    Filed Under: Leader Zone, Methods & Strategies

    Congress: 14% Say Doing a Good Job

    June 21, 2007 By Leave a Comment

    (Gallup) In the latest Gallup poll, only 14% of Americans have a great deal or quite a lot of confidence in Congress. This 14% Congressional confidence rating is the all-time low for this measure, which Gallup initiated in 1973. The previous low point for Congress was 18% at several points in the period of time 1991 to 1994. What does this say?  Will we see great change in 2008 if no one is happy with their politicians?  Will the disgruntled public change out their elected reps?  What should our response be if so many are not happy with the decisions being made by Congress?

    It’s worth remembering that Congress is basically nothing more than a mechanism for the representation of the people’s wishes. We all can’t go to Washington. So we elect men and women and send them off in our stead. It’s not an optimal situation, it seems to me, when such a low percentage of average Americans have confidence in this system. Generally speaking, Americans have been skeptical about Congress for decades now. But the current 14% confidence rating for Congress is down from 19% last year and is the lowest in Gallup’s history, surpassing the 18% confidence in Congress measured in 1991, 1993 and 1994.

    Congress is now nestled at the bottom of the list of Gallup’s annual Confidence in Institutions rankings, along with HMOs. Just 15% of Americans have a great deal or quite a lot of confidence in HMOs. (By way of contrast, 69% of Americans have a great deal or quite a lot of confidence in the military, which tops the list. More on this at galluppoll.com on Thursday).

    Filed Under: Weblog

    2060 – The End?

    June 19, 2007 By Leave a Comment

    This week, a letter from Sir Isaac Newton has gone on show in Jerusalem’s Hebrew University, where Newton uses the Bible’s Book of Daniel to calculate the date for the Apocalypse. He believed the Apocalypse would come in 2060 – exactly 1,260 years after the foundation of the Holy Roman Empire, according to the recently published letter.

    The note reveals a deeply spiritual side to a man more usually regarded as a strict rationalist. Newton, known as the founder of modern physics, secured a royal exemption from ordination in the Church of England – something normally expected of academics in his day – so he would not have to follow its teachings.

    But he confidently stated in the letter that the Bible proved the world would end in 2060, adding: “It may end later, but I see no reason for its ending sooner.” He got at least one other thing right – in another document, he interpreted biblical prophecies to mean that the Jews would return to the Holy Land before the world ended.

    Newton, who died 280 years ago, wrote that the end of days would see “the ruin of the wicked nations, the end of weeping and of all troubles, the return of the Jews (from) captivity and their setting up a flourishing and everlasting Kingdom”. Yemima Ben-Menahem, one of the curators of the exhibition, said: “These documents show a scientist guided by religious fervour, by a desire to see God’s actions in the world.”

    Filed Under: Breaking News, Church, Powerful Passages

    Silver Surfer as Christ Figure

    June 17, 2007 By Leave a Comment

    Just got home from seeing the latest summer blockbuster, Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer that has been brought to the big screen by Stan Lee and 20th Century Fox. It was an excellent movie with incredible special effects and a strong Christ figure in the Silver Surfer. The good story line comes from the comic books (although no face for Galactus?). The cinemaphotography was superb. This blockbuster is supposed to have done nearly $60 million this opening weekend. It will be interesting to see how it does. As of Sunday night, it had more than 4, 700 ratings and an average fan rating of “B” at Yahoo Movies. What do you think?

    Wikipedia tells us that “the Silver Surfer is a fictional Marvel Comics superhero created in 1966 by writer Stan Lee and artist/co-plotter Jack Kirby. They created a character, Norrin Radd, who was a young astronomer of the planet Zenn-La. In order to save his homeworld from destruction by a fearsome cosmic entity known as Galactus, Norrin made a bargain with the being, pledging himself to serve as its herald. Imbued in return with a small portion of Galactus’ Power Cosmic,[1] Norrin acquired great powers, a silvery appearance, and a surfboard-like vehicle — all modeled after a childhood fantasy of his. Known from then on as the Silver Surfer, Norrin began to roam the cosmos searching for new planets for Galactus to consume. When his travels finally took him to Earth, the Surfer came face to face with the Fantastic Four, a team of powerful superheroes that helped him to rediscover his nobility of spirit. Betraying Galactus, the Surfer saved Earth but was punished in return with everlasting exile there.[2]

    Writer/editor Stan Lee, Kirby’s “Fantastic Four” collaborator, loved the character. “I felt that he had to represent more than the typical comic-book hero,” he wrote later. Lee gave the Surfer his own book (without Kirby) and made the character a noble philosopher and Christ figure, trapped on Earth, suffering for mankind’s sins, even doing battle with a Satan stand-in called Mephisto.

    Check it out!

    Filed Under: Movies, The City, The Cultural Conversation

    Best Restaurant in America? In Chicago, of Course

    June 15, 2007 By Leave a Comment

    Where do you think the best restaurant in America is? New York, L.A, San Francisco?…..Nope — It is right ihere in the great city of CHicago.

    Frontera Grill, chef Rick Bayless’ contemporary Mexican restaurant here in the city,  recently won the James Beard award for the nation’s best restaurant. The awards, presented in New York City, are considered the pinnacle of the culinary industry. This is the Frontera’s first Beard award, though Bayless has collected a few over the years, including one for outstanding chef in 1995.  The lively River North restaurant has been packing in the crowds since opening on Clark Street in 1987 and with this award, don’t expect that to change anytime soon.

    Topolobampo — the dressier sister restaurant to Frontera — has been nominated twice for Beard awards.

    Also taking top honors was Tru restaurant, which snagged the outstanding service award after being nominated in that category for the past three years. At the Streeterville restaurant, women are given stools on which to rest their handbags, and every diner leaves with a little bag of baked goodies.

    The only other Chicago winner was chef Grant Achatz of Alinea restaurant, who was named best chef in the Great Lakes region. His competition included fellow Chicago chefs Bruce Sherman of North Pond and Carrie Nahabedian of Naha.

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    Brought to you by Chicago Culinary News

    Filed Under: Chicago, The City, The Cultural Conversation

    Chicago Photo of the Week: Lurie Garden

    June 15, 2007 By Leave a Comment

    Chicago is rocking in the summertime — full of great sights, sounds and smells. IMHO, this is the best place to live, work, play and minister. As I roll through life, I often seek out photobloggers who capture the essence of what Chicago is and when I find those photos, I love to just take them in and see how they are able to see Chicago…and express the clarity of Chicago through the lense. Now I am going to periodically share their excellent work on my blog.

    This week’s photo to be featured comes from a photoblogger “LensImpression” who is exploring the Lurie Garden at Millenium Park. I think he has really captured the feeling of a garden in the city. I love the flowing purples and the feeling a calm in the garden, which is located in the heart of downtwon!  What a place for some solitude.  The flowers blooming now as shown in this shot are …

    * Purple Sensation Alliums … [origin: Asia Minor] …

    * Arkansas Bluestar … [origin: Native]… .

    * Oregano … [origin: Europe] …

    * Meadow Sage … [origin: worldwide] …

    Check out his excellent work here.

    Have you been here?  What do you think? What is your favorite place to visit for some solitude in Chicago? leave a comment below.

    Filed Under: Weblog

    Sunday: “Hello My Name is God”

    June 9, 2007 By Leave a Comment

    What’s in a Name?

    Does it really matter what someone calls you? Think about some of the names you’ve been given throughout your life – your birth name, a nickname, or maybe even a bit more creative and far more hurtful name. Names matter to God.Maybe the only thing you know about God’s name is that you shouldn’t use it in vain. But there’s so much more to know – including the fact that God has many different names. In the culture of the Bible, God’s names defined His character and power. His name meant everything to those who were desperate to understand Him.

    Starting this week, Park Community Church begins a 9 week series looking at the names of God. Each name explaining, unfolding, and revealing something about the nature of God that is crucial for us in our 21st century world. Don’t miss this great opportunity to get to know God up close and personal. Grab some friends and check it out! Coming Up At Park:

    June 10 Jackson Crum Yahweh: Is God Enough?
    June 17 Jackson Crum Abba Father: A Father who is Always There
    June 24 Guest Speaker: Marc Lucenius The Lord our Provider and Shepherd
    July 01 Jackson Crum The God of all Grace
    July 08 Joe Riccardi El’Shaddai: The God of Might
    July 22 Jackson Crum Our Redeemer & Kinsman
    July 29 Guest Speaker: Erwin Lutzer Jehovah Jireh: Our Provider
    August 05 Jackson Crum The Holy & Righteous One

    Filed Under: Weblog

    Family Nights Rock Out!

    June 7, 2007 By Leave a Comment

    We had more than 65 adults and kids out for our first family fun night!  It was a great time of community, games, pizaa and friends.  Big thanks to Jeff and Angela Koch, who ran the games and to Sarah Chambers, our in-house resident AWANA games expert….Next week on Wednesday, we are plannnig to separate out the 1-4 year olds from the larger kids which should make it a better experience for all kids……It is GOOD to be a family in this world-class city.  IF you have any comments or suggestions, please email me here.

    Filed Under: Chicago, Family, Games, Methods & Strategies, The City, Urban Church

    Family Fun Nights Start Tonight!

    June 6, 2007 By Leave a Comment

    Tonight we start our family fun nights at Park Community Church from 6 p.m. – 8 p.m. at Covenant Presbyterian Church’s gym in Bucktown, 2012 W. Dickens Ave.

    Bring your kids each Wednesday night from 6 p.m. – 8 p.m. for pizza, games and fun with other families from Park. NO cost or registration required. Were you an AWANA kid? Want to help this summer? Contact me (Steve Lavey ) at 312-280- 8828 x31 for more information or to be a part of the volunteer team. Click here for a map.

    Filed Under: Weblog

    My 6 Billion Bits of Data

    June 3, 2007 By 1 Comment

    Today the New York TImes has a story about people who are getting the full text of their DNA on a computer disk.

    Soon enough, scientists say, we will all be able to decipher our own genomes — the six billion letters of genetic code containing the complete inventory of the traits we inherited from our parents — for as little as $1,000. Just what we will do with the essence of who we are once we get a copy, however, is likely to be as much a social experiment as a scientific one.

    By the end of the summer, Dr. Church’s research project promises to deliver sequences to its first 10 volunteers. Unlike Dr. Watson, whose complete genome cost $1 million, the project’s volunteers will receive the one percent of their genome currently deemed most useful at a cost of $1,000.

    What will people do with this information? Will it change the way we find a spouse, get a job, choose where to live, whether to have children? Will potential father-in-laws want to see our DNA before agreeing to let us marry their daughters? Wow — this will be a wild ride.

    What stance should the church take on this advance? What do you think about this opportunity? Let’s have a conversation here.

    Filed Under: Technology

    Let the Festivals Begin!

    June 2, 2007 By Leave a Comment

    Park Community Church is committed to encouraging and enabling people stay in the city, to establishing and nurturing families within the city, being role models to our neighbors, and passing on the Gospel to future generations —thus impacting the city of Chicago: one life, one family, one block and one neighborhood at a time. We love to celebrate all the best that Chicago has to offer and that means summer festivals when the weather turn warmer!

    Now that the weather is turning, we are ready to embark on the summer festival calendar here in Chicago. Two street fairs, the 42nd annual Andersonville Midsommarfest and the 33rd annual Wells Street Art Festival, kick off the season starting on June 9 and 10 in Chicago.Midsommarfest will run from 11 a.m. to 10 p.m. daily at Clark Street and Foster Avenue, onetime heart of Chicago’s Swedish community. The Wells Street Art Festival will be held from 10 a.m. to 8 p.m. daily on North Wells between North Avenue and Division Street, in the Old Town area. More than 50,000 people are expected at Midsommarfest, which offers international food, family activities, entertainment on four stages and more than 100 artists showcasing their work. Wells Street expects 70,000 people and 240 artists, with children’s activities and five different bands each day.

    WELLS STREET ART FESTIVAL

    The Wells Street Art Festival is one of the first neighborhood festivals of the season and always draws thousands of visitors to the Old Town area. The Festival features the works or more than 250-juried fine arts exhibitors in addition to an eclectic lineup of more than 20 food vendors representing some of the [Read more...]

    Filed Under: Weblog